Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Don't Follow Your Heart...Lead It

my mentor sent me this quote the other day and it came in perfect timing. i have a tendency of following my feelings more than i do logic. i even spent time in counseling learning that my feelings CAN and WILL lie to me. i know i am to focus on the truth... that i am a beautiful, precious, cherished daughter of my Heavenly Father. i know, i know, i know....but i don't FEEL that way. especially not this week.


i am a flaming 'F' on the Meyers-Briggs temperament profile. this means:

I believe I can make the best decisions by weighing what people care about and the points-of-view of persons involved in a situation. I am concerned with values and what is the best for the people involved. I like to do whatever will establish or maintain harmony. In my relationships, I appear caring, warm, and tactful (ok...maybe tact is one thing i lack...)

The following statements generally apply to me:

I have a people or communications orientation.
I am concerned with harmony and nervous when it is missing.
I look for what is important to others and express concern for others.
I make decisions with my heart and want to be compassionate.
I believe being tactful is more important than telling the “cold” truth. (not so much)
Sometimes I miss seeing or communicating the “hard truth” of situations. 
I am sometimes experienced by others as too idealistic, mushy, or indirect.

i am so tired of myself. does that even make sense? i am so sick of following my heart. i want to lead it. i want to lead it in truth. Phil. 4:8 says "...whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." why is renewing my mind with truth so hard sometimes? why does it come so natural for me to rely on my feelings to make decisions?

Heavenly Father, i am such a mess. i am having such an emotional week. help me to find a balance between my emotions and logic. i don't want to be completely lacking of any feelings but i don't want to rely so heavily on them throughout my days. please show me in a way that i can understand that You love me just as i am. remind me once again, that there's nothing i can do to make You love me more and there's nothing i can do to make You love me less. i need constant reassurance that You still love me, that You have a plan for me and that You haven't forgotten me. i'm sorry to be so needy; i'm just being real. help my unbelief. love, jnt.

1 comments:

Anonymous said...

I somehow stumbled upon your blog and was very touched by it as i can relate! Thanks for sharing <3
Illinois Girl