Ragamuffin Top Challenge -Week 5

i really slacked off this week. 

#1 reason why: this is where i've been staying all week. i've been a little distracted.

#2 reason why: i got eaten alive by an ant(s?) on my toes on Friday and i literally can NOT bend them now. i tried getting on the treadmill saturday and said a few deserved cuss words before i had to give up. i forgot how i allergic i am to those beasts. i tried putting some Benadryl cream on my bites but got no relief. (maybe because it expired in 1999, UNCLE JOHN, AHEM....) desperate means call for desperate measures so i put hemorrhoidal cream on them to maybe relieve the swelling. lovely.

i only walked 10 miles, did my Jessica Simpson workout one day, and did 550 crunches.

i did NOT stay within my WW points. :(
i am housesitting this week, so assuming all scales are accurate:

starting weight 6/1: 140
current weight 6/29: 135.1ish
goal: 125
lost this week: .7
total lost: 4.9

how is everyone else doing?

Accountability: the state of being accountable, liable, or answerable for one's actions

Until recent years, since I discovered what having a personal relationship with Christ was like, I had no use for accountability. I lived my life according to whatever the heck I wanted to do, with whomever I wanted to, wherever I wanted to, for whatever reason I thought good enough. But as I long to align my desires with God's desires for my life, I discover more and more how crucial accountability truly is. To know what accountability IS NOT, you can read about it here.

The Bible says that God holds us accountable. Romans 14:12 says, "So then each of us shall give account of himself to God." This is personal accountability. 

Christians are also called to be accountable to one another. In 1 Corinthians 12, we read that Christians are all part of the same body - the body of Christ - and each member needs or belongs to the other. This Scripture suggests the importance of strong accountability between fellow believers. It is important for every believer to have at least one other person in which to confide, pray with, listen to, and encourage.

Galatians 6:1-2 gives a helpful principle, "Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted. Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ." If your accountability partner has done something contrary to the Bible, you're called to confront him gently, forgive him, and comfort him. It also admonishes you to consider yourself because no one is above temptation.

Another aspect of Christian accountability is encouraging each other to grow in their spiritual maturity. Hebrews 10:24 says, "And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds." 1 Thessalonians 5:11 says to, "…encourage one another and build each other up…"

Lord , You have placed so many godly women in my life and I feel blessed to have the level of comfort that I have with them, to open up and be honest about with my struggles. But I'm asking You to bring a woman into my life who I feel a degree of uncomfortableness, someone who will ask me hard questions. I want to live my life Your way and that does not come natural to me at times. Please bring someone who is a step ahead of me in life to hold me accountable and I ask that You bring someone a step behind me in life, whom I can encourage and challenge. Thank You for caring about the details of my life...even the areas I struggle with. 

Are you accountable? Do you have a friend to whom you can go? Will that person hold you accountable in your spiritual walk? Are you the type of person that people can come to when they need accountability? 

**update: why can't God always answer my prayers this quick? ;-) 

my dear, sweet, and godly friend, Heather Leeds has offered to step up to the plate for me and keep me accountable. Thanks, friend.

the desires of my heart

by Elisabeth Elliot

I had been praying for something I wanted very badly. It seemed a good thing to have, a thing that would make life even more pleasant than it is, and would not in any way hinder my work. God did not give it to me. Why? I do not know all of his reasons, of course. The God who orchestrates the universe has a good many things to consider that have not occurred to me, and it is well that I leave them to Him. But one thing I do understand: He offers me holiness at the price of relinquishing my own will.

"Do you honestly want to know Me?" He asks. I answer yes. "Then do what I say," He replies. "Do it when you understand it; do it when you don't understand it. Take what I give you; be willing not to have what I do not give you. The very relinquishment of this thing that you so urgently desire is a true demonstration of the sincerity of your lifelong prayer: Thy will be done.

So instead of hammering on heaven's door for something which it is now quite clear God does not want me to have, I make my desire an offering. The longed-for thing is material for sacrifice. Here, Lord, it's yours.

He will, I believe, accept the offering. He will transform it into something redemptive. He may perhaps give it back as He did Isaac to Abraham, but He will know that I fully intend to obey Him.

ghostwriter

Some of you may or may not have read two blog entries I had written in the past 2 days. Due to fear of vulnerability (and thanks to the ever so permanent 'Delete' button), I removed said posts off of my public diary. I have been trying to come up with the perfect words to explain right where I'm at and alas, I have found them on my new friend, Annie's blog from today. With every new day, I learn she and I have A LOT in common... for two people who have never met face-to-face. So from Annie's mouth to God's ears, word-for-word...this is how I feel today:

Some things have happened lately - some things that have left me feeling really lousy. Worse than lousy. I would say "shitty," except then some people might get upset. So I'll just leave it at lousy.

What are these "things" that have happened? Well, take your pick - there's a panoply. But I don't want to talk about them, because then you'll know how lousy I am. And that would only make me feel lousier. But they involve miscommunication, and pride, and fear, and insecurity, and rejection. Aren't those the worst things ever? Maybe not worse than war and famine and death. But still, pretty bad feelings.

Times like this make me want to throw in the towel. I feel like throwing my hands up in exasperation, and saying, "Fine, I GIVE UP." I'm tired of trying, tired of tripping, tired of failing, tired of disappointing.

Sometimes I wish that Jesus would just come back.

I feel lousy. But today, I'm going to try to choose hope instead. I'm only a little ragamuffin, making my way as best as I know how. None of us will escape the hard times and the pain and the quiet moments where we question the value of who we are at our very core. But we are called to a long obedience in the same direction, day after day, no matter what. So...

Courage. Onward. And praise the Lord, really.

Spiritual Playpens

by Elisabeth Elliot

Love is the way to maturity. Selfishness stunts growth and keeps us in a spiritual playpen. The world is full of emotional babies, crawling over each other, screaming, "Mine! This I want, and this I shall have, and never mind what it does to anybody else!" What a relief, what peace, when one who has reached spiritual adulthood, who by love has grown out of himself, comes along. He freely gives up his own aims and ambitions, his safety and his cherished plans, his possessions, his feelings, anything at all that will help and says my life for yours. Such a one comes as a rescuer.

To give myself up is the last thing I think of doing. It looks like weakness. In God's eyes, though, it is power.

"We who share His weakness shall by the power of God live with Him in your service" (2 Cor 13:4 NEB).

Ragamuffin Top Challenge- Week 4

i biked 27.5 miles this week, walked/jogged 12.5 miles, did my Jessica Simpson workout once (it's a killer), and did 300 crunches. 
i stayed within my WW points.

starting weight 6/1: 140
current weight 6/22: 135.8
goal: 125
lost this week: 1.2
total lost: 4.2

i'm feeling pretty good. my lower region  is pretty sore, but it's a good sore. let's see who is still in the challenge.

the best father's day ever

Today, I had one of the most special days I've had in a long time. Father's Day is usually a hard day for me since I do not have a relationship with my own father. I do have three men who God has put in my life to teach, model, and pray for me and they were ALL here in Atlanta to celebrate with me today.

My precious uncle John, who spoke to fathers today at NPCC, made me incredibly proud to be his niece. You'll have to go listen to his sermon here. My stepdad, Sid, who has been a God-send to our family and Dad Elmer, (my sister's father-in-law) who has taken me in as his own daughter, both came to church and we all went out to brunch afterwards. 

To top the day off, I actually got a call from my dad, who I haven't heard from in over a year. It was a tough conversation and even in my hurt, all I wanted to do was reach through the phone and love on him. He is so desperate for grace, love, and forgiveness. We all are. He can't give me back the last 11 years, but I told him there's nothing more that I would love than to move forward and reconnect. I honestly don't know if he is a changed man. Although he did apologize for all the hurt he's caused me, I didn't hear any true humility, brokenness or repentance in his voice. Now that I have his address and phone number, I'm gonna go out of my way to pour into him and just meet him where he's at. We'll see how it goes...

Here are some pictures from the day...

this is Grandma and her husband, Wayne

my mom and her husband, Sid

mom, me and Gwamma

we visited Uncle John backstage after the service. IN ANDY'S PERSONAL GREEN ROOM. here i am looking and feeling much wiser in his chair. i feel a sermon coming on...

the Griffins, Elmers, Mays and the Taylor 

Ragamuffin Top Challenge- Week 3

i biked 40 miles this week and did 700 crunches
i almost stayed within my WW points budget- went over 3 flex points (i get 35 a week)
i am on day 37 of my 40-day fast (nothing to drink but water, no chips, no sweets)
i'm not gonna lie...i think i might wake up wednesday and have a mimosa...just because i CAN!

starting weight 6/1: 140
current weight 6/14: 137
goal: 125
lost this week: 1.6
total lost: 3

see for yourself:



let's go check in on the other ragamuffintoppers

thought for the day

"Oh, the comfort - the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person - having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are, chaff and grain together; certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and then with the breath of kindness blow the rest away." -Dinah Maria Mulock Craik

Spiritual Equilibrium

Author: Elisabeth Elliot

Sometimes a hope or desire lays hold on one with such power that it becomes almost burdensome, even though the thing is a delight to contemplate. The ordinary business of life must be attended to, but this thing carries a lot of weight in soul, mind, and heart. It has a strong pull. And when you are carrying a heavy weight, you have to compensate in order to keep your balance. The best means to spiritual equilibrium, I find, is to look repeatedly at the things which are not seen, that is, at things which are eternal. What Evelyn Underhill calls "the pressure of the Divine Charity" forever urges me forward, counteracting the pressure of my emotions and human desires, reminding me with great patience and great persistence that this thing--this love, this longing, this huge desire--is the very thing God Himself gave, in order that I might have "somewhat to offer." He will see to it that it does not come to nothing, provided we lay it before Him, put it at his disposal.

Lord, all that I long for is known to you,
my sighing is no secret from you...
I put my trust in you, Yahweh,
and leave you to answer for me, Lord my God.
--(Ps 38:9, 15 JB)

Ragamuffin Top Challenge Week 2

starting weight 6/1: 140

this week's weigh in 6/8: 138.6

i used a different scale this week, since I was in Charlotte last week, so assuming both scales were accurate:

1.4 down, 13.6 to go!

-i stayed on track with my weight watchers' points

-biked 35 miles

-walked 5 miles this week

2 WW recipes i used this week that i really loved:

Frozen Watermelon Virgin Margaritas 
Substitute other fruit for the watermelon for an almost endless variety of great drinks!

4 cups watermelon chunks, seeds removed
6 tablespoons fresh lime juice
2 tablespoons sugar
4 cup ice cubes
1/8 teaspoon table salt
1/2 lime, cut into wedges for garnish

Combine all ingredients in a blender; pure until smooth. Divide among 4 glasses. Garnish with lime wedges.

Servings: 4
Points: 1

Avocado-Cucumber Toss

POINTS® value | 3
Servings | 4
Preparation Time | 11 min
Cooking Time | 0 min
Level of Difficulty | Easy

side dishes | This cool salad is a fun addition to Mexican food, and it's much healthier than refried beans covered in cheese.

Ingredients
4 tsp apple cider vinegar
1 Tbsp olive oil, extra-virgin
1/2 tsp table salt
1/4 tsp black pepper
1 cup cherry tomato(es), quartered (about 12 tomatoes)
1 cup avocado, peeled (about 1 medium)
2 cup cucumber(s), chopped
Instructions
Combine first 4 ingredients in a jar; cover tightly, and shake vigorously. Place tomato, avocado and cucumber in a bowl; add vinegar mixture, and toss gently to coat. Serve immediately. Yield: 4 1-cup servings.

check back in with the others to see how they did this week!

kid's artwork turned into photographs!

check out this site i stumbled onto today. Yeondoo Jung creates photos of children's drawings. this is one of my favorites! there are a ton more on the website. i just love this concept and could only dream of being this creative. i love it!!!

what's my story? what's my glory?

I had a few precious minutes with my Uncle John yesterday, before leaving for work. He reminded me there is only ONE of me, one jnt. I cannot compare myself to my cousins, my friends, my sister. THIS is the story He has written for me. I can either choose to look in my rearview mirror and focus on the pile of ashes of my past, or I can look straight ahead to the beauty He has in store for me. So it got me thinking, what IS my story? What IS my glory? The one I can call all my own...

1. I was thought of before I was born. 

Jer.1:5 “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart...that is such an amazing thought to me. It blesses me with a sense of value.
2. I was formed and fashioned by God in my mother's womb. 

Psalm 139:15 My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.
3. 1979

-I am the 1st born of David & Lisa Bumbier born in Bryn Mawr, PA. 

Acts 17:26 From one man he made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live.
4. I have a precious sister who loves the Lord, is walking with Christ, and is married to one of the most amazing men after God's own heart I have ever known.
5. 1979-1980 

-I lived in PA as a wee babe.

6. 1980-1990 

-I lived in Orlando, FL. 

-My grandma led me to the Lord and I invited Jesus into my heart when I was 6 years old. 

-My parents got divorced in 1987, when i was 8. 

-My mom was remarried in 1988; my dad remarried in 1989. 

-I moved in with my dad and step-mom in 1990.

7. 1990-1991 

-I lived in King of Prussia, PA with my dad, step-mom, and step-brother.

8. 1991-1998 

-I lived in Orlando with my dad & family until 1994, when i moved back in with my mom and sister. 

-My mom got divorced again in 1991, so when I moved back in with her, it was just mom, Esther, and me. 

-My dad and step-mom had my half-sister, Michele, in 1992. 

-They were divorced in 1997. 

-Dated my high school sweetheart, Jeff, from 1995-1997.

9. 1998-2001 

-I lived in Raleigh, NC and went to college at NC State, where I majored in Communication and minored in Psychology. 

-I dated 3 guys during my college years and ran as far away as I could from God. 

-These were years of brokenness as a prodigal in the wilderness. 

-My mom married Sid in 2000.

10. 2002 

-I lived in 3 different states that year. I lived in Atlanta from Jan-Aug., moved all my things back to Orlando and stayed 3 weeks until I decided to move everything up to Richmond, VA to be in the same city as my boyfriend. 

11. 2002-2003 

-I lived in Richmond, VA. 

-Jay was the first Christian I dated and I thought for sure he was "the one". Unfortunately, I was wrong. We sought pre-engagement counsel from Uncle John & Aunt Debbie the summer of 2003. 

-While we were in Alpharetta, we visited North Point Community Church. I fell in love. With Jesus. Broke it off with Jay when I realized I didn't love him the way I wanted to love my future husband. 

12. 2003-2008 

Atlanta, GA 

-I moved to Alpharetta because I simply HAD to be at NPCC, listening to Andy Stanley every Sunday. I became a sponge and I finally learned how to apply biblical truth to my everyday life. I found out for the first time how to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.

-I took a year off from dating 11/03-11/04 and it was one of the best things I've ever done for myself. 

-I regretted not taking a longer hiatus after falling fast and furiously in love with a man who broke my heart in 2005. 

-I dated another man in 2007, but with lots of prayer and wise counsel, realized that he wasn't God's very best for me. 

-I was baptized by Uncle John on my 28th birthday at NPCC. 

-Worked for Dentistry at Northpoint and the best boss I've ever had from 2003-2008. 

-Spent a year in counseling with Debbie Causey from 2004-2005, where she taught me how to replace Satan's lies with God's truth. 

-I've moved 5 times in the last 4 1/2 years, gotten out of debt (FINALLY!), and am currently unemployed and BEGGING God for a new adventure. 

-I have had zero relationship with my father in the last 11 years. I think I've seen him a total of 3 or 4 times and have had limited conversations with him (his choice, not mine). It's been heartbreaking, but the Lord has blessed me with several replacement fathers, including my stepdad, my uncle John, and my sister's father-in-law, Mike Elmer. 

There's my story. The much edited and G-rated version.

So, what's my glory? My special cause for pride or delight? Isaiah 61:3 says, "To all who mourn in Israel, he will give beauty for ashes, joy instead of mourning, praise instead of despair. For the Lord has planted them like strong and graceful oaks for his own glory." Tim LaHaye and Jerry Jenkins write, "So often we wallow in the ashes of our sin. We roll in the dust of our failures and misfortunes. We allow ourselves to be covered with the soot of Satan's lies and the dirt of our own sinful nature. We live in regret and shame over past sins and pitiful habits. We struggle in the mire of our own self-doubt. But God never intended us to stay there. His intent is to free us!" 

I get the most glory when I am doing what I feel like I was made to do, which is serving. I love loving on people; blessing them with my time, treasure, or talent. I glory in bringing God glory. When I get distracted and start focusing on myself and what I don't have that I want (a husband and children, a perfect body, chocolate without calories, an unlimited amount of money, a dad who who wants to be a part of my life, revenge), I become a self-absorbed wreck. I am at my finest when the focus is off of myself and on other people. That's why I love to serve. Is there anything I can do for YOU today? ;-)

Thank You, Jesus, for the story You've predestined for me and ONLY me. Thank You for the parents You strategically gave me, for the God-fearing extended family You put me in. Thank you for my health, my education, and the privilege to be an American. Thank You in advance for what the future holds, for You are already there. May any glory I receive, glorify You. You must increase. I must decrease. That is my hope and prayer today.

What's your story? What's your glory? 

Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4

Lord, here are my desires for my husband:

1. a man who is financially reliable and responsible
he's either debt free or on his way to being there; actively saves and gives; sticks to a budget

2. romantic
makes me feel special; very affectionate; thoughtful with his words and deeds; adores me and celebrates who God made me, even if I AM a little crazy; loves quality time....

3. forgiving
I have a past that may be unacceptable for certain men. If he can't forgive me and realize I am a different person, then he's not the one for me.

4. He is a strong spiritual leader and will be the "man of the house".

Definitely be able to say no to me and put me in my place.

5. He will desire traditional roles and it is my desire to live solely on his income.

If I choose to work, we will agree on that together but I don't want my income to supplement his.

6. He will want to have and adopt lots of babies, to raise up godly generations with me.

7. I desire a man humble enough to seek counsel when needed. 

8. He is loyal and agrees with me that divorce is not an option. Ever.

After listening to Voddie Baucham's series Love and Marriage, I have added that he must be:

9. a man who leads in love: (true love = an act of the will accompanied by emotion that leads to action on behalf of its object).

10. a man who leads in the Word: discipling and mentoring me and the capability of doing the same for our children.

11. a man who leads in righteousness: doing everything in his power to preserve my righteousness and purity.

12. a man who leads in selflessness: understanding what it means to put others before himself; serves and meets my needs by treasuring, nurturing, caring, nourishing, valuing, and protecting me; being more interested in what he can give me than what he can take from me

13. a man who leads in intimacy: creating a hedge of protection and prioritizing our relationship above all others

P.S. Lord, since we're being honest, I might as well tell You EVERY desire. The following are negotiable but would be definite bonuses. I really want him to have dark hair. Brown is really good. I'm flexible on eye color. ;-) I'd love for him to have a brilliant smile, with great teeth. :) And I have to like listening to his voice. And I really want him to have a good relationship with his family (parents and siblings) and want to spend time with mine. Ideally, I'd like him to currently have a roommate so he knows how to compromise and share his space. And he has to be an amazing maker-outer, love Mexican food, and love to laugh. And desire to get to know my family and friends. And do crazy things with me, like sky-diving. I'm not naturally spontaneous, so I'd like him to be...but also likes to do nothing... cause that's important too. And i'd love for him to be adventurous and travel with me to new and exciting places as well as try new things with me, cause You know how much I love change. I'd love to marry an extrovert, since I'm an introvert, so we could balance each other out. (Ideally, an ESTP or an ESFP...i'm just sayin'...) Also, it would mean a lot to me if he went through my uncle John's men's group to learn how to live life on purpose, in balance. Wow. I think that about covers it. Thanks for caring about the details of my life, both the big and the small. I can't wait to meet him, Lord, the man You created for me. I'm really excited and I ask that You continue to shape and mold me into the woman he desires, as well. I already love him and I don't even know who he is.

the moment i wake up, before i put on my makeup, i say a little prayer for you

Dear Lord,

You know that right now in my life I am struggling to be CONTENT in all circumstances, for in Philippians 4:11 it says..."for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances". You also know that my desire is to be married so I may be a godly wife and mother. I am learning to put my trust in You and know that Your timing is perfect (although it is definitely not what I would choose!) and that You have the perfect man for me. I want Your perfect mate for me. I know that ALL things work together for good to those that love the Lord. I do love You, Lord, and I turn this over to You. I give my future husband to You, whomever he may be. I'll pray for him knowing that You will bring him to me in Your timing. 

I no longer will seek to find what I want, but what You would have for me. I give my desire to get married over to You. Do with me as You will...and with that I will be content. 

...for I know God's smallest blessings are FAR GREATER than my greatest dreams...

the Ragamuffin Top Challenge

Carlos, a complete stranger, whose blog i follow daily, has issued a challenge. i'm taking it. here are the rules:


1. You must have a measurable goal.

i will be 30 in less than 8 months. my birthday present to myself is to weigh 125 again. i weigh 140 now. i can lose 15 lbs. in 8 months, right?! piece of cake! wait. hold that..

i've already given up sweets, every beverage but water, and chips 24 days ago. i'm already walking/biking 25 miles a week. so it is back to counting points at Weight Watchers (20 points a day) again. and kicking it (or walking or biking it) to 40 miles a week. so there you have it. i'm hoping it won't take me 8 MONTHS to lose the 15 lbs...

2. You must place a photo or video on your blog each weekend and give us the scoop on how you did.

3. You must link back here so that the readers of your blog get to see how the rest of us are failing or succeeding.

4. You fill out the linky thing below and then people can get to your blog from my front page and we can cheer each other on.

let's get physical... physical...